Making Amends

Making Amends

I walked to the barn for my lesson last night with my positivity hat on.  I also immediately walked to a lovely group of barn ladies enjoying Sangria, and I had a glass.

I figured Sangria could only help our situation.

(P.S. I have no media so enjoy these random faces of Simon while I tried to take a picture of his new bonnet I made)


Simon brought his A-game too.  He actually trotted up to me in the pasture, which has never ever happened.  We warmed up very purposely with me concentrating on him being in front of my leg and listening well.

Before we started jumping, my trainer and I talked a little bit about what happened.  She said we were crawling to the oxer, which I knew, and he had been leaving long previously.  So I leaned for the long one (won’t be doing that again), and since he was going slow he decided to just squeeze one more in… but there was no room for squeezing.  Hearing her observations actually made me feel better before we even started jumping, because it’s a scenario that’s happened a lot before.  Just this time there wasn’t room for another one.  He didn’t plant his think down thinking I would come off.


So our first round was a mix of 2’0″ singles and cross rails.  We picked up our canter and I was like HORSE WE WILL GO FORWARD and Simon said, “Oh jesus who are you and what have you done to my mother?!”  Almost every spot was gross because I was sitting up in case he added, and he was taking every long spot possible because he was showing me how absolutely committed he was to the jump… plus I had too much canter.


It was fugly at first, but neither one of us were even thinking about stopping.

After I realized my horse wasn’t ruined, I talked to my trainer about getting help finding the right pace.  I feel like lately I’m either way too slow or way too fast.  She said that Simon has changed a lot too, so it’s hard.  His stride is more open and he likes the long spot more these days.  She also said that both me and my horse have a mental pause about oxers, so I’m going to have to remember to sit up and ride over every oxer probably for the rest of our careers.


We gradually got more and more complicated with adding in some slices and some more solid jumps, plus a different tiny oxer.  Nothing was huge and nothing was super impressive, but I got some cajones back and was able to go over all the fences with my horse.  I’ll take it!


Still won’t make a decision about the derby for a bit, but I’m feeling a lot better overall.

36 thoughts on “Making Amends

  1. Yay! I don’t know if this is what happened to you… but I have a tendency to snowball the situation into epic proportions and one bad ride –> I’m ruining my horse — in a heartbeat. And then I have a conversation with my trainer and realize I just made a simple mistake and if I don’t do that anymore things will be fine. LOL. Anyway I’m glad the private lesson boosted your confidence like you hoped it would!

  2. Glad you had a good lesson! Sounds like the info from your trainer really helped!

    Bad rides can be so disheartening (ask me how I know…)

  3. So so glad you had a good ride! Sounds like you have a good trainer that knows you and Simon well. I used to get a little knotted up about oxers too, til I repeated to myself “oxers are fun, oxers are fun” over and over. I actually managed to brainwash myself.

  4. Awesome! Sometimes getting the bad rides out of the way helps to make for some really awesome rides!

  5. So proud of you, you go! What a great feeling. You’ve got this! Pace is hard. I think Denny Emeraon said find your pace and you find your distances.

  6. YAY sounds like a good lesson! By the way your trainer explained it, it definitely sounds like an honest mistake! At least you know what you can do to improve to keep that from happening again and move forward from here :)!

  7. Yay for a great lesson! Simon looks like he’s asking for your forgiveness in that first photo. 🙂

    I rode a few stoppers years ago and it definitely messed with me when it comes to oxers and triple bars. I had a really hard time with triple bars.

  8. love the bonnet!! also congrats on making it happen in a lesson. i struggle SO HARD with finding the right pace too… but really it’s gotta feel good to hear your trainer talk about how Simon’s stride has developed and improved!

  9. You should feel really great about your ride! Sounds like you both brought your A-game 🙂 Also, cute bonnet-I like him in that color.

  10. YAY! The long weak spot to an oxer when I lean is also the only thing that my mare will stop at. I’m always like, “how smart of you to just stop instead of crashing into that, mare”.

    You guys will figure it out 😀

  11. Glad you had a nice ride! The bad rides often serve as a wake up call for things that need to be worked on…its easy to get sucked into complacency. I’m sure the rest of your lessons will go well too since you are now a woman on a mission!

  12. Sangria never hurts, IMO. Glad to hear you’re feeling more confident! It sounds like it was a great lesson. 🙂

    Moe is addicted to the long spot (and I seem to have an eye for the long spot regardless of what horse I’m on); he and I have many, many totally insane distances over the years, but I find it way more comforting than chipping in and feeling like we’re both going to die.

  13. What’s an oxer? Just kidding. I haven’t jumped one of those in a long, long, long time. I’m in the world of Xs and verticals and I had a scenario the other day where I knocked over a standard. I’m going back to Kindergarten. 🙁 Hang in there. You two were meant to be together and the ups and downs is part of the deal. 🙂

  14. Hey, good for you!!! Love the mental “get it done” attitude… from BOTH of you. Simon is so cute.

    I was reading somewhere recently that horses’ memories are thought to be longer and more colorful than elephants’ memories. I have no doubt he remembered… and since he is a good soul I bet he wanted to make it up to you!

    Glad for both of you. Simon is awesome and so are you!

  15. Maybe it should be a glass of sangria for 2′, then half glass for every 3″. Oxers wouldnt be scary… Although balance might be lol. Glad u had a good lesson.

  16. So glad you had such a great lesson! It’s easy to take one bad ride – or even on stop – and go to that “I suck I’m ruining my horse place” in your head. Glad you’re in a more positive space, and Simon is too!

  17. Long spots are always fun….kidding of course 😉 My old mare used to prefer longs when I started jumping with her – managed to get her best long on photo:

    Yeah, she thought the shadow was part of the jump 😉 Luckily she got much better at choosing her spot later. I specifically trained her to choose her own spot first, and only after she got that done well, did I start adjusting her. One major exercise that helped was Circle of Death 😉

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