My dad has this thing he likes to say about buckets. To him, life is a bucket and if you have a lot going on that makes you personally happy and fulfilled, your bucket is full. Sometimes we’ll be talking about someone who seems a bit lost or preoccupied with irrelevant drama. He’ll say, “Her bucket isn’t full,” as an explanation for the behavior. I started this blog in 2010 when I first moved to Austin. In the early days,…
My grandmother passed away on Monday afternoon. She was 90… or nearly 90… The age of death leaves the biggest impression when it is unreasonably young or exceptionally old. She was neither, but had a good run. A week and a half ago she had a massive stroke. At the time, they planned to move her to hospice and told my mother that she would never be responsive again. Of course my grandmother was an incredibly determined person, and decided to run away…
I recently finished the most relate-able book to my situation, The Mediocre Widow. There are lots of gems from this book that I could tell you about, but the topic I’m thinking about today is milestones. In her novel, Tidd talks about how widows will dread a milestone and be depressed about it far in advance. Often they aren’t even aware that they’re doing it, but many times when the day comes it’s not nearly as bad as all the time…
If you surrendered to the air, you could ride it. – Toni Morrison I’ve always been a sentimental schmuck, which can also be categorized as a mild hoarder. When I was a little kid, there was always at least one shoebox full of special items stored away under my bed. A vending machine ring from an elementary school crush. A worn piece of wide ruled paper folded up into a fortune teller. A plastic whale I was too old to…
Once upon a time, the show series I showed at the most was a huge fan of nontraditional ribbon colors. Every 1-8 had a rainbow stripe down the middle and I have some rather interesting champion ribbons from various divisions. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a satin addict regardless of color so if a ribbon is big with a pretty medal medallion – I’m thrilled… even if it is orange, brown and dark red (true story). However, when it comes between…
I am learning to live with the longing. Hours after Tim died, I sat on my back porch with a friend and the two county appointed crisis counselors. My friend rubbed my back and sat there, silently present until she needed to answer a question or wrangle my cell phone away from me. The crisis counselor sat in the chair across from me, leaning forward on her elbows with her hands clasped. I remember her voice was patient, and her…
Last Friday evening I had a rep from County Saddlery come out to fit myself and Simon for a new saddle. The previous company I had out was CWD, and I don’t think you can get two saddles that are more polar opposites than County & CWD. My high level overview of comparing the two sales pitches would be: CWD – It’s technology! It’s French! It’s super kewl! Did I mention it’s French? County – This is a saddle. It is made…
As I mentioned in my Simon haiku updates, I decided to take Simon to a last minute one day schooling show at our local show facility. Normally in November we trek up to Waco for the big year end show with our local show circuit, but this year that seemed like a huge expense to undertake when I didn’t feel prepared. Also if I’m being honest, I haven’t felt very much into the jumpers lately. I think it’s due to…