I’ve been experiencing a bit of a shift in my perspective as of late.
It started intentionally and coming from myself. When I headed into my lesson on Tuesday afternoon to prep for the show, I decided I would not once say “That looks big” or ask for anything to be taken down. I need to jump bigger, but more importantly I need to believe that I can do this.
One of my life coping mechanisms is sarcastic humor. That’s all fine and dandy, but sometimes I wonder if my “jokes” about me dying/sucking/ruining my horse are harmful to my psyche. I kind of think they are.
Then life happened, and I realized something. There are things that are a lot scarier than jumping a course of 2’9″ jumps. Yes… even if every jump is an oxer at max width.
I can be a little intimidated. A little nervous. A little excited even… but I’m not going to let myself be scared of riding or showing again.
Bring on the oxers!