This whole “rebuilding my life” process isn’t going as smoothly as I hoped it might. Partially I blame grief, but when you grieve as long and as deep as I have it’s easy to blame grief for everything. Grief is like just getting out of the shower on a cold morning when the heat hasn’t kicked on yet, and someone throws a towel over your head. You’re wet and cold. You can’t see anything because there’s a fucking towel over your…
Being married can be a lot like hibernation. You spend all this time when you’re younger dreaming up the right person that you could imagine spending your life with. They’ve got the humor of your favorite comedian, the body of your favorite movie star, the voice of your favorite musician. We grow up with these different archetypes surrounding us in media, and throw different qualities on our theoretical ideal like slapping clay onto a sculpture. Of course the people we end…
I blamed the two glasses of wine but the truth is I had been pondering about diving into the dark world that is Tinder, so I didn’t protest when my friend took my phone and started installing the app. “Now you can only choose one horse photo. Which is your favorite?” I pointed to my favorite show picture, us jumping a sizable coop where my equitation looks baller. She frowned. “No, that won’t be impressive to anyone else. Here… I like…