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Category: Grief

My China Moves On (and I did a little too)

My China Moves On (and I did a little too)

Moving on looks like many different things. Last week for me, it looked like soup bowls. I’m not one to buy a lot of new kitchenware. It’s expensive, and I don’t even currently own a dining table of any kind. The chances of me setting up a spread with formal china are about as likely as my chances to make the short list for World Cup — it ain’t happening. The plates I use every day are the same ones…

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Marine Layer

Marine Layer

I don’t think I’ve ever been in a situation where all of my friends in my immediate surrounding are writers. It’s not that I haven’t had writer friends before grad school. I have — I’ve known writers my entire life. They’ve been this lovely, obscure group of people that I can gush about books with and don’t blink at the idea of making jello shots for a poetry reading of The Rime of the Ancient Mariner turned musical when paired with…

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Palm to Head

Palm to Head

I could write a lot about what’s been going on in the last month, but I’m not. If I did, it would be a mashup of margaritas, anxiety, bad dates, long walks, mental health and palm trees. Maybe soon, but today I want to talk about headaches. My mom has always suffered from migraines. When we were little kids, she would get quiet in the car and tell us that she wasn’t feeling well. After that it was the fastest…

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Trying Yoga – Come for the Fitness, Stay for the Tears

Trying Yoga – Come for the Fitness, Stay for the Tears

I’ve never been much into mysticism. Meditation and the third eye are fine things… for other people. As for me, my brain is rooted in a world of practicality. I blame my Republican upbringing and excellent grasp of reality. Still, I keep hearing all these amazing things about yoga. A former co-worker used to tell me how not only was it making her stronger, but she left classes feeling centered and at one with her world. I have plenty of…

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Observations From One Month in California

Observations From One Month in California

I’ve been a west coast resident for an entire month. So obviously, I’m tanner and I’m thinner than I was when I left Austin. That’s just what happens here. Something in the air. Don’t hate the beautiful people! Jokes aside, I am starting to get in a better place with my health. To help Pascale cope with losing her big backyard and barn time, I walk the dogs 2-3 miles a day. Plus the university’s baseball complex by my apartment…

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A Reminder for Me to Stop Overly Planning My Life

A Reminder for Me to Stop Overly Planning My Life

As long as I can remember, I’ve been a planner. With many things, this is an asset. For example, I’ve planned the shit out of my upcoming move which is now two weeks away. Every week had a to do list and a timeline for goals, so now even with unexpected bumps in the road… I haven’t crawled into a fetal position with a bottle of wine for the mental breakdown I’m pretty sure I’m do. Actually, I’ve been clipping along…

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The Lines Between People & Possessions

The Lines Between People & Possessions

People tend to show their love and wealth through possessions. One of the first things I did when my Dad visited this past weekend was to hand him a few trinkets I bought him from Japan. Even as I bought them, I knew that they weren’t items he wouldn’t be able to live without but I felt it necessarily to come back with something. To me, coming back with a few items in plastic bags with foreign script says I was…

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Two Years

Two Years

Sunday is the two year anniversary of Tim’s death. In the two weeks leading up to this milestone, I dreamt about him often. I dreamt that I was in a van traveling up the east coast, carrying his suitcase and things around with me. He traveled with me in the cargo area, but nobody else could see him. I asked him if he was upset he died young. “I accomplished a ton before I died,” he said. It was something…

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