I spent the majority of my work day yesterday (don’t tell my boss!) responding to comments via email. There were so many sincere, thoughtful and amazing offers of help and support that I didn’t think a “Thanks!” comment left in response on the blog was enough. I’m still not done sending my replies, but am getting there.
After work I went home to let the dogs out. I didn’t feel like riding, but pushed myself out to the barn anyway. I put on my good riding clothes – not the ratty old breeches with a hole in them and a faded polo shirt, and I even tucked in my shirt with a belt.
On the drive to the barn with Pascale loaded up in the back, I blasted Girl Talk’s “Feed the Animals” and sang all the obscene bits out loud to no one. It was an album that Tim introduced me too, but I pondered that in a factual versus emotional way.
At the barn, I told myself that sitting on Roman was the victory and everything else was a bonus. We trotted around. We worked on going deep in our corners, bending in our circles, not being heavy and keeping pace consistent. I sat the trot and held my two point and tried to keep the thud thud thud of his hooves on the ring footing as steady as they could be. It wasn’t an intense ride, but it was a ride. After I rubbed my palm over his wide blaze, which has gotten a little furrier in the weeks I’ve missed being out there.
I checked in on Simon, who whinnied to me before power walking to me from across the pasture. He snarfed up his treats and then licked my arm while I rubbed his own forehead and watched the white hairs scatter from the middle of his fuzzy star.
Then I left to grab a quick dinner with barn friends, and ate a club sandwich is the most superior sandwich. I order club sandwiches all the time and I’m not even a member – I don’t know how I get away with it. That’s something Tim introduced me too as well, but again it’s a factual versus an emotional recollection.
In the quiet hours of the evening back at my house, I worked on another re-write of a piece that I want to be stunning but itsn’t quite there yet. The dogs wrestled in the study while I tapped on my MacBook. It was Tim’s, but now it’s my writing computer. I left his robot stickers by the apple logo, and added a black dog sticker I picked up at Dog Mountain.
Tonight I get to go see Amy Schumer live with my best friend.
Tomorrow morning I go hiking with the dogs.
Tomorrow afternoon I will ride the blaze face and the nerd horse.
Tomorrow night I will write.
The next morning I’ll wake up to start something all over again, and I will be okay.