My learning experience horse hauled off this morning to a new home in Colorado. He’ll be loved by really nice people and continue his path towards the hunter/jumper ring under a knowledgeable trainer. Although I’ve never bought or sold a horse sight unseen before, I feel good about his new family. I think he will be loved and cared for, which is as much as any horse can want out of life.

I can’t really adequately express how relieved I am to have Roman sold. He’s possibly the sweetest horse I’ll ever own – one that wants to constantly kissed and cuddled and hugged. I’ll miss that big smushy nose, but not the financial and time stress that owning two horses has put on me.

Roman left behind a huge hole in my bank account, but that’s my fault – not his. He taught me that completely stretching my pennies for horses isn’t a lifestyle I can really get behind these days. Maybe one day my financial situation will be different, and I’ll be able to afford two. Until then, I’ll become a one horse owner because of what I learned from Roman.

From Roman I learned that I don’t have the confidence for a green bean unless I can ride my bombproof kickass jumper on a regular basis. Without Simon’s steady companionship to remind me that I actually do know how to ride, I wasn’t able to excel with Roman.

I also learned not to buy a horse unless I’m 100% over the moon excited (in a can’t sleep kind of way) about it. This is no critique on Roman, but when I bought him I had a “Okay cool, I finally found a suitable horse that vets” feeling instead of a “I CAN’T WAIT TO PLAY WITH MY NEW HORSE” vibe. Looking back, I never got over not being able to purchase my dream horse baby brontosaurus. In Roman’s early weeks, I think I spent more time than I should have wishing he were my dream quarter horse hunter. It set him up for early failure in my eyes, which wasn’t fair to him.

Roman didn’t turn out to be the horse I wanted him to, but he is still a good egg. My trainer and I (let’s be real, mostly my trainer) fixed a lot with his flatwork and improved the creature we originally took home. I wish we could have improved him with much less of a financial hit to me, but hey – not all learning experiences are cheap. If the worst thing I did in the year after losing Tim was lose money on a horse, well I think I did okay.

Today the Roman chapter is over for me. I’m not sad. I’ll be curious to look him up on social media in a few years, and hope he turns into the quality show horse that I know he can be.

28 COMMENTS

  1. It’s always a bit sad to let them go, but from your blog post you sound relieved that he has found a new home. I’m happy for you. 🙂

  2. I’m so relieved that you were able to sell him. I know how that weight feels to have an additional horse that you aren’t meshing with that’s eating your budget. I think it will be interesting how he progresses in time. I’m the same way with progressing with Copper and needing Paige as my fall back to remember that horses are fun (if Copper is being bad…if he’s being good, its all yay horses all the time…). I bought Paige right after Dad died, so a kind of similar situation…only difference was I had the green bean already and wanted the broke horse. 😉

  3. So glad Roman found a new family. I experienced a similar life lesson but I haven’t been able to sell mine yet. Money keeps sucking into that big black hole…

  4. Yay, I’m so happy he’s sold! It’s hard to sell horses, I’m glad he found a good family, hopefully in a year you can post about what fun stuff he’s doing in his new home 🙂

  5. Hurrah for a good home and less financial burden! And I totally agree with you re: losing sleep over the right thing. That’s been a rule I’ve made for myself for various things in life the past several years. The right horse is one you can’t get off your brain no matter how much you try!

  6. Congrats on finding Roman a home- I also know how much of a relief it is to get some closure (and financial stability) back from selling the horse that was never really “yours”. I’m glad you’ve still got Simon and now some peace of mind!!

  7. Sounds like this was the right move — both for him and for you.

    It’s not really money wasted. Lots of people that I know buy horses and, for various reasons, discover they are not a good match. It helped you grow as a rider and explore what you want to have in your next horse. There are plenty of ways to spend money and this seems like a reasonable one!

    Now on to enjoying Simon and having your next adventure.

  8. You know what, I’m glad you did this. I know it sucks right now financially, but if you hadn’t gotten a second horse I think you would have always wondered… and living life with regrets is no way to live. So for better or worse, you learned a lot and I think you’ll be happier for it. So glad Roman finally found a good place to land <3

  9. Congrats on the sale and return to a more positive financial position. I did the two horse thing 2 ways once upon a time…leased a going horse while I waited for my yearling to grow up (no complaints, totally right thing to do), then owned 2 with the intention of selling the yearling once he was green broke (didnotgoasplanned). Learning experiences both times, arrived at one of the same conclusions you did, must have deeper pockets to successfully justify and enjoy 2 boarded horses. Live and learn and enjoy the ride!

  10. awesome that you were able to find him a home – sounds like a promising situation for you! also i appreciate your honesty in the above post on the whole expectations v reality thing and how that can play out emotional and financially in a situation like the above.

  11. Good luck to Mr. Roman! While you say he wasn’t your best investment, I do think that he’s just part of the journey. Cheers to the next part!

  12. Aw, I wish he had been your dream horse, but your dream horse is still out there, and until then you have Simon who is pretty dreamy too. I’m glad the stress of the journey is off of your shoulders and now you can freely move forward into other endeavors!

  13. You guys followed the campsite rule: you left him in better condition than you found him, which is a total win, even if the relationships wasn’t one.

  14. Where in Colorado did he wind up? I live in Denver and would be happy to give you an update if I ever were to see him at a show! 🙂

  15. I’m happy for you both! It’s always bitter sweet when one moves on, but clearly this is the right path for you and Roman. It sounds like he’s heading to a great life in Colorado. And now you can focus on kicking jumper ring butt!

  16. Sometimes we just chalk it up to a learning experience. Not everyone has the means or need for multiple horses. It takes time and money to see to them and their individual needs. The more horses- the more time and money needed and invested. If you’re not a good mesh – it wears on you both. Roman is a big hearted horse and he probably also felt it that although he was trying his best, doing what he knew and hoping to please you, it somehow wasn’t quite ‘enough’. You did right by him while he was yours and now he will be someone else’s superstar just like Simon is yours. That’s his journey in life.

  17. Glad Roman found a great home. I hope he gets a guest feature once in a while. He just looks so sweet and I am sure he is going to make his new lady very happy!

    To you, congrats on selling him. Even bigger congrats for realizing fairly quickly that Roman wasn’t the right horse for you. Many of us have spent YEARS trying to make the wrong horse work and have just done a complete injustice to both parties. Just glad you kept our favorite bay nerd horse!

  18. Sad he is onto a new home – but also exciting he is moving on to new adventures 🙂

    As a sidenote, I just wanted to let you know I have changed my blog name, so it may not show up in your reader list anymore. The new url is www dot twoandahalfhorses dot blogspot dot com. You may have to re-enter it into your reader list to follow again.

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